I've known that I'm leaving for a month now and it's been cool, refreshing, comfortable. I've been able to brush off lots of politics and troublesome issues just by thinking "It's not my problem, I'm out of here." And yet, as I've worked on various committees and various projects, I have kept saying "We," and "our," and "I," and "my."
Until yesterday. I'm not sure what happened, but yesterday, it hit me hard. I'm really leaving, I've crossed the point-of-no-return, what the heck am I doing? So, being me, I got weepy. And, I was weepy and crying all damn day.
I hate being weepy. I hate being an "emotional woman." Hate it, hate it, hate it.
I couldn't talk to Monica, cause I was weepy. Couldn't talk to Jody, cause I was weepy. Pat said it was good for me to be weepy, cause I'm letting out all my stress and anxiety. (She was probably just grateful that she didn't have give me another massage and try to loosen up my tight, tight neck and shoulder muscles...)
But it still doesn't mean that I have to like it. Resolution for today and tomorrow, No more crying.