Sunday, February 24, 2008

12 years ago...

Yesterday was Miss Kat's birthday. She's now 12.

Yesterday, I thougt about posting and waxing poetically about my day 12 years ago when she was born and how wonderful it was and how happy we were to have her join our small, happy family.

But that was yesterday. Today, she's annoyed me once too often to think about how happy we were when she was born. Instead, I remember that she was born mad, and is still mad, 12 years later.

And, yes, she WAS born mad. She was induced, and evidently, she absolutely did not want to be born yet. She still likes things done her way and in her own time. It's enough to drive me mad. She's the reason I have gray hair. She really is.

Today, instead of the baby who liked to laugh and giggle at her big brother and her daddy, I'm remembering the baby who refused to sleep in a crib and would only sleep when laying on my chest or her father's chest. We'd get her to sleep, put her down and she'd wake up...mad, no furious. So, we'd pick her up and hold her. Maybe some would consider that we spoiled her. We thought then, and still think, that it was self preservation. We could get sleep ourselves if we held her. If not, it was a very long night. Voice of experience there. Believe me, we both wanted to sleep in our bed and not take turns on the couch holding the little red-headed monster.

Today, 12 years after her birth, she still knows exactly what buttons to push. She knows how to drive me insane (and her father and brother too.) Kev and I often say that if Miss Kat would have been our first born, she'd have been an only child.

Don't get me wrong. I like the fact that she's got a strong personality and that she can and does stand up for herself, and she won't be led around by peer pressure...she'll be busily creating peer pressure for others not to succumb to it herself. But, I've got to admit, that living with such a strong personality is not easy.

So, for today I won't remember the sweet smile and the cuddles and snuggles that she's rapidly outgrowing. I'll remember those another day. Cause right now, the beast that lies inside that small petite body and behind those brilliant blue eyes is winning the war. Today, I completely understand why some animals eat their young.

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